Blame the Poor

The following is from The Independent and is both funny, true and very sad:

The poor spend all the money. Isn’t it obvious?
It’s a tricky argument to pull off – the poor caused the debt so they should pay it back

In a couple of weeks, the economy will be put right.
Because at last cuts such as the “bedroom tax” and universal tax credit come in, so we’ll finally get some money back off the richest people in this country – the poor. Any glance at our society makes it obvious who’s run up all the debts; the poor, that’s who, swanning around in charity shop cardigans and galavanting on shopping expeditions like the women in Sex and the City, squealing “Hey let’s go to Poundland and buy a dishcloth”, in ways the rich can barely dream of.

The rich have to pay for the poor’s avarice, with many currency speculators at Price Waterhouse having to take on extra work to make ends meet. They’ve barely finished destabilising the yen when they take two buses to a cleaning job, polishing a bedsit in Tower Hamlets. Many CEOs find their salary runs out and live on cat food until their bonus arrives, and 40 per cent of the board at the Royal Bank of Scotland are now on the game.

This is mainstream economics, that the poor are richer than the rich. Modern politicians must see a film on Comic Relief about starving children in Somalia and cry: “What a tragedy. Is it any wonder Africa’s in a pickle while the extravagant pigs flaunt their mosquitoes like that?” Then they call the number on the screen and pledge to help out the village by shutting down their well.

It’s an imaginative approach, because less qualified types might imagine the banking crisis may have been caused, in some part, by bankers. But it takes a trained mind to understand that the people who robbed us are the poor. If a government minister stormed into a bank in the middle of an armed robbery, he’d yell: “There are the robbers; those bastards lying on the floor tied up and snivelling that they don’t want to die. And someone help out this man, the poor chap’s trying to carry a sack AND a sawn-off shotgun, he’ll pull a muscle.”

It’s a tricky argument to pull off, that the poor caused the debt so they should pay it back. Maybe that’s why most weeks there are stories in certain newspapers about a woman with 45 kids on benefits, who then bought a giraffe and now that’s on benefits but she said it was cramped so the council has put it up in the Shard, and two of the kids have got Compulsive Potting Disorder so they’ve been given a snooker table but she couldn’t be referee because she’s allergic to white gloves so the mayor has to do it, otherwise he’d be put in jail by Europe.

Then they quietly drop the story when it emerges that the reporter missed out the detail that although it did happen, it was in a dream he had while suffering from food poisoning.

So it’s replaced with an article about a man on invalidity benefit who turned out to be secretly competing in triathlon tournaments in his loft, and there’s a woman who hasn’t worked since 1975 who receives so much in housing benefit that she pays Martin Amis to fill in her claim forms for more money. And they’ll print an extract that starts: “You ask why I have attended no job interview in 38 years and I can only weep the tears of a fallen angel, reach to the constellations and ask that you, dear assessor, replete in your cruddy crude crudeness, be spared the dodgy knee I’ve had all that time. Time. Whatever, whenever, whoever my succulent sobriquet, that may be. Oh, and I need a new fridge.”

Iain Duncan Smith will raise the case in parliament, until it turns out it was made up on a website called “People On Benefits Are Aliens From Jupiter – FACT!!!” and it is never mentioned again.

Then they turn to immigrants, and this time all politicians agree we can’t carry on as we are, paying all these benefits to them because we’re about to run out of everything. If he was to glance at his own department’s figures, Duncan Smith would see that 6.6 per cent of immigrants claim benefits, compared with 16.6 per cent of non-immigrants. Which goes to show that he doesn’t have time to look at figures because he’s a very busy man given that he’s working, and anyone who receives benefits who quotes a statistic correctly should have their money cut since they’ve been arsing about looking at numbers when they should be trying to get work.

At least they’re attacking the poor, though, who caused the mess in the first place. Because the banking system, as we know, was ruined by the residents of a tower block in Toxteth. In league with a woman from Sunderland on invalidity benefit with chronic back pain, they lent vast sums to international investors at the bottom of a stairwell by the bins, with not a thought for the damage caused to the global financial system. So now they’re being turfed out of their house for having a spare room for their kids. That’ll teach them.

Stockport Air Raid Shelters

I went down into the old Stockport Air Raid Shelters yesterday. They are tunnels dug into the sandstone cliff and they go right underneath the town centre. During the Blitz thousands of people would hide in perfect safety in the tunnels while the bombs were dropping.

The tunnels are great. They are about 1 mile long and could provide shelter for 6,500 people. The shelters were fitted with basic amenities: electric lights, benches and bunk beds, flushing toilets (not pretty), first aid post and sick bay. During the war the shelters were nicknamed the Chestergate Hotel because of the ‘luxurious’ standard of accommodation they offered.

It only costs £4.50 to go down into the tunnels but guided tours do cost more. There is the inevitable gift shop but I didn’t see a café. If you are stuck for something to do this summer you could do a lot worse than visit the Stockport Air Raid Shelters.

BWFC Pre-Season

A lot of Bolton fans are kicking off about us having a “crap” pre-season. Pre-season form means absolutely nothing. The games are nothing more than semi-competitive training sessions. I wouldn’t mind this pre-season hasn’t actually been that bad so far.

I know relegation was painful and that Owen Coyle does need to regain the confidence of the fans. I just think that now, more than ever, it is important that we all get behind the team and the manager. If we can go straight back up we’ll be fine. If we get stuck in the Championship things could get a lot worst before they get better.

Let’s look forward to a good season that ends with a championship and promotion back to the Premier League.

COME ON YOU WHITES!!!

Guns!!!

There has been another mass-shooting in America. A 24 year old man got up half way through a screening of the new Batman film and opened fire on the other people in the theatre. At the time of writing this the current death toll is 14 with at least 50 others injured. I feel so sorry for the people caught up in the incident. It’s come to something when a night at the movies can end in such horrific circumstances.

How does a 24 year old man in the richest country on Earth become so fucked up that he decides to shoot a cinema full of young people just out for a good time? I’m not excusing what he has done and he should be locked up for life but people aren’t born evil. They usually end up that way because of years of systematic abuse or some other kind of serious childhood trauma. This might have been in the home or it could have been at school. I can’t believe movies, video games or rap music are the cause. Maybe he just had a chemical imbalance in his brain that led him into this tragedy.

Incidents like this do happen in other parts of the Western world but seem particularly prevalent in the US. So what is it about America that results in this type of incident occurring on a fairly regular basis? In the UK we do have a problem with violent crime and violent behaviour but guns are very hard to obtain and are generally only found in the hands of gang members and serious criminals. If someone with no criminal connections suddenly goes mental it doesn’t usually result in mass-murder. Even if the person wanted to shoot people it is unlikely they would be able to obtain a gun. A UK citizen who is not involved in gangs or serious criminality is very unlikely to be involved in a shooting incident.

Guns seem to be an integral part of American culture. It’s like a hangover from the Wild West. Combine that with the crazy US gun laws and you have a recipe for disaster. Guns are easy to obtain and many people keep a gun at their home. The right to bear arms is in the US constitution but surely the time has come re-evaluate the law and introduce much stricter gun controls. Sadly, I don’t think it will happen in an election year because Obama wouldn’t dare face the backlash from the powerful gun lobby and the right wing media. If the gun laws can’t be changed maybe a period of national self-reflection is needed to try and bring an end to the misery guns bring to thousands of Americans every year.

I'm Still Here....

I’ve not updated my BLOG for ages. I would say I’ve been busy but that would be bollocks. I just got out of the habit of updating it.

It’s been another year of highs and lows and peaks and troughs. I just count my blessings and keep on plodding along. In many ways I’m lucky. Despite redundancy offers I’m still in work and I’ve still got a roof over my head (mainly thanks to the roofer who sorted out my damaged slates this morning). I know a lot of people haven’t been so lucky and my thoughts are with them.

I’ve not been to many gigs so far this year as there haven’t been many I wanted to see. I went to Noel Gallagher a couple of months back where he proved beyond doubt that he is far more talented than his knob-head brother. I also went to the Stone Roses reunion gig at Heaton Park. I loved the Stone Roses when I was a teen so it was a very special night that brought back some great memories. It was dry the night we went so my specially purchased cool as fuck US Army surplus Poncho wasn’t needed!

There has been a lot of bad publicity in relation to the London Olympics over the last couple of weeks. The G4S security cock up, the thousands of tickets that have suddenly come on sale for the “sold out” events and the traffic / public transport problems in London are all genuine areas of concern. Despite all this I’m really looking forward to the Olympics. I admit I’m biased as I managed to get a ticket for the athletics but even if I wasn’t going I would still be excited about the games starting. I’ve loved watching the Olympics on the television since being a child. I think it’s great they are being held in Britain. I’m sure once it all gets going the media and public will be much more enthusiastic.

I’m keeping my fingers crossed that at some point we will get something resembling a summer but I’m not holding my breath. They do say the Jet Stream is slowly starting to move north so we might get a bit of sunshine. I don’t know if it’s because of climate change or just part of the normal cycle of weather patterns but either way the seasons just seem to be totally screwed up.

That’s all for now but I will try and get back in the habit of updating regularly.

Music and Mayhem

A couple of weeks back I went to see Blondie at the O2 Academy in Liverpool. It was the second time I’ve seen Blondie live and they were great. They belted out all the classics interspersed with tracks from the new album. It was the last gig of their UK tour and you could tell from the start they were going to make it a night to remember.

Blondie have been together for 37 years now and still know how to throw a party. Debbie Harry still has an amazing stage presence and she was clearly enjoying herself in Liverpool. The songs from the new Album, “Panic of Girls” were very well received but the old favourites including Union City Blue, Atomic, One Way or Another and Rapture drove the crowd wild. The set also included an excellent cover of The Beastie Boys’ You’ve Gotta Fight for your Right to Party. I think it’s obligatory when playing in Liverpool to do a cover of a Beatles classic and they belted out a cracking version of Please Please Me. My only complaint about the gig was the ridiculous temperature in the venue. It was hotter than Hell in there and the sweat was literally dripping from the ceiling. Debbie even commented on it saying it felt like a hot summer in New York City.

We stayed the night in Liverpool at the Premier Inn at the Albert Dock and the next day we went to Tate Liverpool and The Beatles Experience. We had a cracking couple of days.

Blondie set list (I think it's right):
Union City Blue
Dreaming
Atomic
D-Day
Hanging On The Telephone
Call Me
Love Doesn’t Frighten Me
Maria
Girlie Girlie
What I Heard
Sunday Girl
China Shoes
Wipe Off My Sweat
Horizontal Twist
Mother
Rapture/Fight For Your Right To Party
One Way Or Another

Please Please Me
Rip Her To Shreds
Heart Of Glass

On an entirely different note a lot of people thought I would have been on here blogging about the riots but I just didn’t know what to say. The whole sorry affair was and is very depressing. I could rant about the evils of the corrupt capitalist system and the root causes of crime and antisocial behaviour. I could cry about the members of society who have been left behind and abandoned. The only thing I’m certain of is the clear evidence that poverty and crime go hand in hand. I know that some of the looters were employed and educated but the vast majority come from some of the most economically deprived areas of our country.

We are now in a situation where in many ways we aren’t really citizens of a nation state anymore we are just consumers in a global market. Those who don’t have enough money to play a role in the market are either ignored or ridiculed.

If any good can come from these inexcusable riots it’ll be that society opens its eyes and realises it can no longer ignore the consequences of inter-generational unemployment and benefit reliance. We need to invest huge sums of money to fix the problems but there isn’t any money to spend. Maybe if we made the huge corporations who make Billions of pounds in the UK but don’t pay full taxes cough up some cash we could at least take some steps in the right direction.